Library / Rejection Sensitivity
Read this when
Radical Acceptance: Chapter 1, The Trance of Unworthiness
That feeling that something's wrong with you and everyone will eventually notice? There's a name for it. ✨
Who it's for
Brach names a quiet, background belief many people carry: that they are somehow deficient and will be rejected if others see them clearly.
Feelings it meets
What it is
The first chapter of Tara Brach's Radical Acceptance describes the 'trance of unworthiness': a pervasive sense of falling short that can show up as constant striving, self-criticism, depression or addiction. Brach traces how cultural and family messages that we must be different to belong reinforce this feeling, contrasting Western ideas of original sin with the Buddhist view of inherent goodness.
Where to find it
In print, ebook and audiobook; widely held in libraries.
Before you start
Heads up: Brief mentions of depression.
Age: General audience (suggested 16+)
We read the world wrong and say that it deceives us.Rabindranath Tagore, Stray Birds, no. 75
Also for rejection sensitivity
Do You Really Want to Hurt MeSong · 1982
Who SaysSong · 2011
He's Just Not That Into YouFilm · 2009
Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—LoveBook · 2010
Rejection Proof: How I Beat Fear and Became Invincible Through 100 Days of RejectionBook · 2015
The Pulse: Why Rejection Hurts So Much — And How to CopePodcast · 2023